i was so desperate in late 90s of the last century,iraq was like dying country,people were so miserable ,we were squeezed hard by the UN blockade,
i was a doctor ,but could hardly earn my living ,but mostly things were just intolerable.
we were harassed all the time ,i thought of every way to flee ,and once i had the chance ,i took it right away..i had to leave an old mother and a sister in her late 40s,all alone,i kept thinking how will they manage alone ,i used to take care of things for them for years ,but again i just reached a state i could not tolerate things no more .. so i took the ride from mosul in the north of iraq ,to the borders to jordan,about 800 km ,it was a non stop drive ,no one ever did know about my plans..only my poor mother(it must be kept a secret or i get caught) who stood at the door all tears ,and my wailing sister,i never looked back to see their faces ,i knew i may go crazy and burst into tears ,i dreaded the idea. now 2 hrs on the road it was getting dark ,the driver who also knew of our plan of escape ,he kept silent ,he witnessed the last minute of my departure ,and the tragic scene,so i suppose he thought not to talk and add to the bitterness ..he said some words ,i did not answer . for tears were still welling in my eyes ,we reached the border with jordan at dusk ,i was so tired ,mental exhaustion was wearing me out ,physically i could almost collapse ,any minute ,so at last.. the critical moments were i had to check with the customs officer ,Iraqi customs ,you must know these are high ranking officers very loyal to the regeme and real cruel and feared by all,i was really afraid..if they knew i was on the run ,i was to go to prison ,with no one else to know where and when shall i be out again ..the kind driver tipped me some secrets ,he said dont ever say anything unless you are asked ..second..he added say the least as possible,try keep your mouth shut as much as you can ..look as if you were on a bussiness trip ,as a tradesman ,be very little eloquent ,say words like you are of some very middle class people ,and if asked hard questions ..you should look baffled and not knowing what to answer but never waver,keep your nerves like in freeze ..any way if you got caught ,you can do nothing.. keep that in mind ,so take your chances bravely ,and pray for luck .. if you were kept long in there he said ,he will tell them he is never with me or we will both be canned together..
but thats all ,it seems God was with me again ,as if all were blinded..like they never saw me,never asked me anything.. otherwise i was so weak still afraid and faltering ,any question ,will put me wide in the open ,and its the can waiting for me ..my pulse was halved.. as we crossed the border at last,once inside jordan territories ,i knew i made an escape ,and tears came to my eyes again,i remembered mother ,and poor sister ,i will never see hem again ,for anyone fleeing like that could never even hope of getting back inside ,it woul be suicide for sure .
i stayed in jordan for a while ,i had brothers in canada ,they sent me some money ,they were well off ,been there for 30 y by then ,they ran away many years ahead of me ,so i managed get a ticket to yemen ,the only country who will accept iraqis,i tried diffirent countries but i was pushed away .
i rode the plain to yemen ,i knew non there whomever ,in jordan ,on the passenger plane who lifted me up to the high clouds at midnight ,to yemen where i knew absolutely none there.. Now i was really scared,alone,no one to know and no support of any kind going to a place i ve never seen or head before.. only with one idea in mind,they needed doctors there ,it was very good in that case ,5 hours in the air ,i was completely off balance was shaky all over it was like one ride from home to yemen..a ride to the unkown with no comeback ever.. all in all about 3 days travelling ,
i landed in Sanaa ,capital of yemen ,i just heard of it ,never seen it before or known anything about it ..
it was a miserable airport ,it was like garage ,only planes sheltered sheltered there and not cars .. at the checkpoint the yemeni officer asked few questions ,chewing lots of gatt .. a hallucinating plant they chew to get high..eyes so bright and piercing from the drug ,
i asked for a bus to midtown(at the reception or so it seemed ,how funny i almost laughed at him and myself).. they said there was none ,so i took the first taxi i saw.. it was the 60s model ,the driver was so messy ,and dirty ,and mouth full of that drug gatt ,eyes blazing ,i was so occupied in thought and mind i was dazed and all like lost .. i never asked how much will it cost me ,after 30 min . ride ,he said he will charge me 100 dollars ,i shreaked like hell,i said ,its only a few kilometers ride .. he said ,look ,you have some options..though very few ,i leave you here in the desert and not on the main road ,but away from it, so you can never get another ride and he laughed loud at me ..or you pay,he said after a while .. i pleaded i have not that lot on me ,but he will never budge ,he even insinuated he will fight for whats his right ,i took it as a threat ,so i kept silent .. after a while he asked.. ok give me the money, i said i will pay half what he asked ,but no ..he wanted all ..i was so tired all drained up ,so hungry ,and not knowing what i am doing . What!-i thought- was all this right ,i regretted everything ,now its about 3 days traveling ,i almost went to tears ,but i never showed it ,if he knew of my weakness ,he will take the money and everything and kill me just the same so ..i tried all my best to re-negotiate with him ,like increasing the bet from 50 upto 90 ,but again he said in a very harsh and loud voice that he will get his money,all of it- only when i am tucked in a hotel .. and I complimented him as yemenees were very good arab nationalist-i was laughing at myself,he was joking at my words and rediculing me ,i was sure ,but i think he thought to himself to settle for 90 dollars at last-it was a long negotiation- .. by then the lights of sanaa were in sight,i thought the nightmare was at end ,i said to myself wake up ,but it was not a nightmare ,he took his money and threw my luggage at some dirty hotel entrance ,the owner was at the door ,saying in a shrill voice,like a pig ,welcome welcome ,this is like your home ,we are all arabs ,so welcome you are in happy yemen- so they called it ,i made it to the entrance where i collapsed just upon going inside inside..
this will be continued as i see fit..